by Melissa Karnaze

"Don't take it personally."

"It's not about you."

"Just let it go."

NAPROSYN FOR SALE, That's what they say. What they hope you'll believe.

What they tell themselves over and and over again in hopes that repetition makes it true, NAPROSYN photos.

But it is about you. Buy NAPROSYN online cod, Because you did take it personally.

It did upset you, NAPROSYN FOR SALE. It did irk you. It did ruin your day, my NAPROSYN experience.

There's no taking that back. Buy cheap NAPROSYN no rx, When something triggers an emotional reaction in you -- you have already taken it personally.

What "Don't take it personally" really means

When people tell you not to take something personally, this is what they mean:

NAPROSYN FOR SALE, "This really upsets you, doesn't it. Shoot, we can't let that spiral out of control, after NAPROSYN. Because I have a phobia of anger and all the other ugly emotions. NAPROSYN australia, uk, us, usa, I'd be way too uncomfortable if you stayed with this feeling. Frankly, I never let myself feel this way for too long because I have no idea what to do with it, discount NAPROSYN.

Here, I have an idea -- just pretend it doesn't really matter to you, NAPROSYN FOR SALE. That might quell your upset. Low dose NAPROSYN, How will we do that. Let's distance you from the situation with abstract language.

Let's say that this event/person/situation is not about you or directed at you (even though you already experienced it that way -- even though all of life is experienced subjectively), NAPROSYN gel, ointment, cream, pill, spray, continuous-release, extended-release. NAPROSYN FOR SALE, Let's say, don't "make this" about you when it really isn't. Don't make it any messier than it needs to be."

Why everything you experience is personal

Any time you get upset, NAPROSYN blogs, feel hurt or frustrated -- it is a personal issue.

Some thing gave you cause to feel a certain way.

Every emotion you experience is an obviously personal matter, NAPROSYN pics. You feel because something happened, Buy NAPROSYN from canada, something that your subconscious cognitive networks deemed important for you to be alerted of -- via your bodily emotions.

So by the time that thing gave you cause to feel, it's too late, NAPROSYN FOR SALE.

It's personal.

Otherwise you wouldn't be emotional about it.

Why it's better just to admit this

It can be tempting to pretend you can take a redo, buy NAPROSYN without prescription,

"Wait, Effects of NAPROSYN, let me take back that emotion. It doesn't mean much. Because this really isn't personal, NAPROSYN without a prescription. It's not important to me after all."
NAPROSYN FOR SALE, That'd be a nice try. A nice attempt at a side swipe. NAPROSYN treatment, What would you be dodging exactly.

Response ability. For big things, NAPROSYN schedule, like life, NAPROSYN brand name, and your emotional health and well-being.

You would be dodging your personal responsibility of taking yourself -- and your emotions -- seriously, NAPROSYN FOR SALE.

You know, like a response able adult would do, NAPROSYN interactions.

When you pretend that you can "not take things personally" you get yourself into serious trouble -- with yourself of course. Purchase NAPROSYN online no prescription, Your emotional self, Inner Child/Ego.

And you start a war against your true feelings, buy NAPROSYN online no prescription. NAPROSYN FOR SALE, Trying to shove them down hoping your subconscious won't notice.

All because your friend has no idea what to do with an uncomfortable emotion. NAPROSYN street price, All because society has no idea. All because the world goes 'round deathly afraid of emotions.

A constructive way to take things personally

If you're on the path of creating your life as a mindful construct, order NAPROSYN no prescription, you know what this path requires.

It requires that you commit yourself to nurturing your relationship with you, so that it's as healthy as it can be, NAPROSYN FOR SALE. NAPROSYN forum, So that all your emotions are juiced and worked just right so they grant you more intelligence and response ability to life.

That means, anytime something bothers you, online buy NAPROSYN without a prescription, you let it bother you -- mindfully so.

You take it damn personally, damn proudly, for as long as it takes.

You say to yourself:

"Yes, this irks the irk out of me. NAPROSYN FOR SALE, And it's funny, because my friend so and so would tell me not to take this personally because it's not worth it. But I know it's worth it.

I'm going to stay with this emotion for as long as it takes for me to understand why I'm experiencing it. Because when I find out why. Man oh man, will the experience mobilize me for the the better.

Yes, this is very personal, NAPROSYN FOR SALE. It's so personal it can change my life for the better. Help me grow and learn how to take better care of myself. But only if I sit with it. Only if I let it ruin my day. NAPROSYN FOR SALE, Because I have to find out why. And to find out why, I need to take the journey within."

What it really means to take things personally

Taking something so personally it makes your knees shake -- is the only way to live your life with the kind of mindfulness that matters. The only way to construct your life in a way that works for you.

Taking something so personally it makes your knees shake means saying no to the rest of the world when it'd rather you retreat with fear; reframe the situation in a dysfunctional way to distance yourself from your true feelings.

Taking something so personally it makes your knees shake is one of the noblest things you can do, so long as you work with your emotions constructively after the fact. It's the only way to truly know thyself, NAPROSYN FOR SALE.

So take it personally. It's all personal. It's all about you. It's all going to happen whether you like it or not. NAPROSYN FOR SALE, You can't control what happens to you, or how personal it feels.

You can only choose how you respond after it happens.

What do you think?

Are you convinced that taking things personally can actually be good for you.

Why or why not.

Let's get personal about this topic. I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments below.

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{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }

Sonia Connolly March 1, 2010 at 1:29 pm

“Taking something so personally it makes your knees shake” – I love this! I share your perception that often people don’t want us to take things personally because of their own discomfort with rawness and conflict. I’ve also noticed that telling myself not to take something personally doesn’t make it stop hurting.

I’m absolutely with you about acknowledging and sitting with my emotions, and letting myself be at the center of my own story.

At the same time, I find that it does help me to remember that I am not at the center of other people’s stories, and often they’re on their own trajectory not even noticing that something might be painful for me. Yes, I sit with my feelings of abandonment around that!

Like most “common sense”, I think there’s both a damaging and an affirming way to interpret “don’t take it personally.” Thanks for the thought-provoking post!

Melissa Karnaze March 1, 2010 at 2:11 pm

Great to see you again Sonia!

Yes, it’s good to remember that you are not the center of other people’s stories. And I would say, only after you first believe that you *are* the center of their stories, if that’s how it plays out with your emotions. The next article is lined up to talk about this timing thing in more detail.

Pat March 2, 2010 at 5:15 am

“Taking something so personally it makes your knees shake” – this is an appropriate description. What an uncomfortable feeling that is! One I experienced yesterday. I wish that I had birthed it longer before I responded. If I had I would have recognized each of us had projected our own fear onto the other and my response will only make the situation worse. I wait with baited breath for the follow up article about timing!

Haider March 2, 2010 at 5:28 am

“Take It Personally” is the title of a blog post sitting in my Drafts page :)

While there is some good in not taking things personally (e.g. not being offended when our beliefs are questioned), it is wrong to ask people to detach themselves from the things that matter to them, and that includes their emotions and ambitions.

I quit my job because I couldn’t waste my life under poor management. I couldn’t see the project I was working on and felt passionate about being trampled on for political gains.

It takes a personal investment to engage in the things that matter to us, so it’s only natural that we take them personally.

Melissa Karnaze March 2, 2010 at 5:05 pm

Pat, it’s so wonderful to see you here! Yes, the knees shaking part just seemed like the natural description. :P

Great timing! Would you be interested in describing a little more how taking it personally would have allowed you to see that you both were projecting fear onto the other? Because what you are describing is that being highly *irrational* (taking it knee-shaking personally) would actually let you see things with much more *clear* thinking!

Haider, another wavelength synchronicity eh? ;)

Can’t wait to read your article on the topic, this one was a draft for waay too long!

“While there is some good in not taking things personally (e.g. not being offended when our beliefs are questioned)…”

Yes! I like to think about this type of “not taking things personally” as having healthy mental *boundaries.* And good strong boundaries come from tons of genuine emotional work and introspection. Being able to establish mindful boundaries is like the reward for all your hard work.

“…it is wrong to ask people to detach themselves from the things that matter to them, and that includes their emotions and ambitions.”

Exactly. Telling someone not to take things personally is basically telling them how_they_should_feel. Pretty righteous if you ask me.

Awesome for you Haider for not settling for less with your career, thanks for sharing. :)

Pat March 3, 2010 at 7:11 am

I received an email that I took personally on a strictly superficial basic. Had I taken it into my body so personally that my knees were shaking BEFORE I fired off a pissy response I would have understood what was actually being conveyed. My sending the email troubled me so I went back an read the initial communication. Only then did I take it deeply within to see what I was doing was not helpful to the person. I was projecting some of my own fear and they had realized that. I was able to talk to the person before they read my inappropriate email (yes it said things that I did not really mean). At that time I told them what I ‘heard’ in the email and they acknowledged that yes they were trying to let me know they needed to work this out without having to deal with my emotions playing in as well; and in as kind a way as possible. It was cleansing and healing for both of us to have this genuine and frank conversation. Thank you, Melissa, for these articles. I have been working on these issues for sometime and they are very enlightening to me!

Melissa Karnaze March 3, 2010 at 6:41 pm

Pat, wonderful to hear you worked it out together. Thanks for sharing that experience! It’s amazing how much more you can see when you let yourself sink into your emotional experience. :)

Robin August 1, 2011 at 4:25 pm

Sorry about the negativity, but this kinda hit a nerve.
We are discouraged from taking anything, anything at all personally. According to the world, it is never ‘about us’. If we get offended, hurt, or ‘upset’ it’s our own fault for having expectations to begin with. Or so it goes. Unfortunately, if I had kids, I would encourage them to not take anything personally, either. Otherwise, they’ll suffer a lot more in life. Lost jobs, relationships, the works. I try very, very hard to be less serious, to not let things bother me. It’s a tremendous effort to be ‘laid back’. To not react, or get upset, or emotional. Otherwise, a life of social isolation will probably result. I know, I’ve been there. This is not meant to be critical (thought it definitely sounds that way) but there comes a point at which ‘healthy’ meets ‘reality’ and unfortunately, ‘reality’ wins.

Melissa Karnaze August 2, 2011 at 8:47 am

I try very, very hard to be less serious, to not let things bother me. It’s a tremendous effort to be ‘laid back’.

How is that working for you?

This is not meant to be critical (thought it definitely sounds that way) but there comes a point at which ‘healthy’ meets ‘reality’ and unfortunately, ‘reality’ wins.

There’s a point when you choose pessimism over constructive experimentation and essentially “give up” and compromise yourself. “Reality” talk is one way to justify giving up. You co-create your reality every single day. Conforming to dysfunctional social norms is an individual decision.

Taking things personally does not have to result in lost jobs and relationships. Although a degree of taking things personally might help you realize that you’d rather pass on certain jobs and “relationships.”

Carlo Alcos March 19, 2012 at 9:06 pm

This is a very interesting take on this topic…I wrote about the same thing, but from a different angle. “How a Fly Reminded Me It’s Never Personal”

I see the point you’re making, to honour your true and real emotional reaction to something. That is important.

Jack Smith June 1, 2012 at 10:13 pm

Do not take everything personally…Sometimes people are trying to just use an example to prove a point and they aren’t even referring to you or think of you in that way and then you end up taking it personally and argue against it and you never progress anywhere.

Heather January 10, 2014 at 2:20 pm

Great article! I have similar perspectives. I always thought it sounded hypocritical for someone to say “be mindful”, “practice nonresistance”, but “don’t take it personally”. To me it sounds like a contradiction. I can control my external reactions, but I agree feelings and internal reactions can’t be controled – we can just become aware of what is going on inside ourself and trying to control that is the receipe for suffering. At least in my experience trying to make my feelings go away instead if meditate on them seems to be bad advice. I am aware the world doesn’t revolve around me but that doesn’t mean my ego doesn’t interpret it that way. It seems as if “don’t take personally” is asking me to create another ego inside myself to try to slay the first ego response. Sometimes I wonder people really must be saying something else – but to me it sounds like a attempt at a spiritual bypass.

Heather January 10, 2014 at 2:36 pm

Also trying not to take something personally sounds like effort and effort blocks insights. Insights like seeing the suffering of another comes from letting go, surrendering, and accepting the “what is” not trying to change it. If you truly want to know yourself I think it’s about surrendering to your own inner knowing and getting in touch with that not trying to conform to someone else’s expectations or time table. Often the advice seems like an after sight not something to try to obtain

Nicole April 19, 2014 at 2:11 pm

It seems to me that every person that ever accomplished anything great was very passionate and took it very personally. I don’t think passion and being impersonal match because impersonal indicates lack of care. So fine I take things personally. When are other people going to stop trying to control others with statements like ” your taking this way to personal.” It seems like a shame tactic and I thing they say after they express themselves. As in “don’t take this personal but…. ” Which usually is pretty offensive. It is my right to feel what I feel. I believe people that don’t want to take things personally are weaker individuals in avoidance of conflict and what they perceive as negative emotions.

Kim February 2, 2015 at 7:00 am

Its the same outcome, regardless if you take it personal or you choose not take it personally: DO YOUR WORK. Uncover why you’re having an emotional response. If your approach is to uncover your issue because something happened that’s easier to let go of when you don’t make it about you, fine. If your approach is to uncover your issue because something happen that’s easier to let go of because you make it about you, fine. At the end of the day DO YOUR WORK.

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